Daddy

My father would have been 98 years old today had he lived.  He sort of curled up emotionally and  physically after Mom died back in 1994.  He managed to hang on for about 18 months but not a single day after Mom died did he enjoy life. I used to feel so helpless when trying to care for him as absolutely nothing made any difference to him emotionally…and I remember thinking “thank God I don’t love anyone that much”……….

I adore my husband and children………….I love my siblings……..and there are a few that I number as family and I love them……but I do not have the all consuming need to be with someone to the exclusion of everyone else that my dad had for mom………

I used to think that there was something wrong with me as I didn’t share the kind of….well….obsession I guess that my parents had.  Now I am simply grateful that I don’t share it.  After watching my strong father turn into a shell of a man I am terribly grateful that I don’t have that kind of obsession for anyone. I know that I can survive and actually be happy should anything happen to George…..oh boy, that may have sounded much worse than what I meant.  Oh well.

After dad died, we found out all kinds of stuff about him that we had never known….like what he did during WW2……..we all knew he had been in the Navy and was a photographer’s mate…we never did know he was assigned to the OSS though…turns out daddy was a sort of a spy. I guess he had taken an oath or something because it was a complete surprise to all of the kids.  Dad was also the ONLY man ever to receive a military retirement ceremony even though he was a civilian……..now I have no idea how that came about, but we have pictures of his retirement ceremony and all the pomp and circumstance of the military ceremony is quite clear in them….and we have three articles from local papers telling us about it all…….we just don’t know WHY……………

I wonder if my children will wonder about my life when I die the way I think about my dad? I doubt it…Rich knows a heck of a lot about my life as I have told him, or he’s read it in the papers……….Rob simply doesn’t give a damn and frankly that is his loss not mine………

Oh dear sounded uncaring again, didn’t I? My friends know why Rob is estranged…everyone else? nun-ya as Mom would say.  It simply is none of your business.  I was considering writing a journal for Richard should he ever want to know the gory details that I haven’t told him but then I am too lazy (or concerned with his emotional well-being) to do so. He’ll simply have to read the blog to find out what I was thinking…….and even that may not be enough to explain anything!

sliceofquao

slightly Insane brain

We Hold These Truths To Be Self-Evident

that all men are created equal

forresting my cloud

welcome! may my paintings/art/film and haiku fill all your whimsical cravings!

Ammaarah Writes

aspiring writer, self proclaimed poet, pretentious film enthusiast, avid book reader, intersectional feminist

The Book of Life 📖

Symphony of my experiences in travel, tech, food and everything else I love.

Easter Ellen

Overcoming to Becoming.

sibple

my not so simple bipolar life

Superman cant find a phone booth

trying to save the day in my own unique way

Joel Hulsey

Overthinking and misunderstanding.

Just Me

Inside the mind of a broken, lonely woman.

James Proclaims!

The wit and wisdom of a man who has neither...

Richmond Road

An old man wrestling with the alphabet. And other stuff.

Cage Dunn: Writer, Author, Teller-of-tall-tales

Manic, obsessed, driven to story - all story. Read, write, think, do; dabble, plan, play, do. Do more - More - MORE!

Running In My Head

rantings & ramblings of a book-loving, coffee-drinking, marathon-running social studies teacher

Marriage, Relationships

Intimate Relationships

dark anki

"Imagination: Upcoming Reality"

what sandra thinks

fiction.poetry.art.truth.humor.life

The Planet According to Dom

The workings of a dyslexic mind

No Purpose Club

Go Aimless , Live Life...

whatarshisays

A Little Bit of Me

Megspot

So it doesn't come out in polite conversation

Haider's Solace

Showing Through My Sight

Rhapsody Bohème

A warriors journey

Success Inspirers World

Land of opportunity where everyone is given an opportunity to grow

Planet Simon

A blog about life, the universe and some things that happen in it...

The Cheeky Cyclist

Life is better on a bicycle! Stories and adventures of an everyday dreamer sitting atop a bike saddle.

The Non-Alcoholic Student

Ramblings on the University experience from a sober student

Randomness Inked

Scribbling the Unspoken

Writings of The Count Gustaf

Abstract absurdist literature, from The Count Gustafs' emotionally indulgent, besotted with cerebration, and experience seeking brain.

Nan's Notebook

Things I want to say about this, that, and the other thing.

Filosofa's Word

Cognito Ergo Sum

Think Outside The Toaster

Where there's always a side of burnt toast...

Zombie Flamingos

A journey into bloggerdom

The Death Project

Susan Briscoe

Mary J Melange

A hodgepodge of thoughts, ideas and the reality of life.

MHZADA

Every day is another chance to change your life

GABBY'S PLACE

where common sense collides with nonsense

Its good to be crazy Sometimes

A view from the inside of going through the minefield of the British benefit system if you are disabled and the ups and downs of coping with mental illness

Biff Sock Pow

Finding the humor in everyday life.

rarasaur

frightfully wondrous things happen here.

The Chatty Introvert

A recovering recluse stumbles from her dark hole in pursuit of a brighter world (and a decent cup of tea)

Fluent Historian

Foreign languages, history, writing

Red's Wrap

Happiness. It's relative.

McClendon Villa

Hearts building a home, one day at a time...

moo393

Anytime, Anywhere.

%d bloggers like this:
search previous next tag category expand menu location phone mail time cart zoom edit close