whinging onwards to Shakespeare

I’m tired. So tired that I am finding it impossible to sleep. And once I finally manage to fall asleep, my legs start up their happy dancing and jerking and I startle awake again………

It’s so much fun getting older.

I know 98% of this “tired” crap is a the release of the extreme stress of the past 3 weeks…or is it 4 weeks? I no longer remember.

From George’s initial doctors office visit and “not feeling quite up to par’ to the cardiac testing, then emergency transfer to another city and a heart hospital to being told “you might want to say goodbye to him”…….then the extreme stresses of hanging out in the hospital, seeing the surgery, wondering if my hubby was going to wake up……………then starting rehab, more doctor’s visits, then his resignation from the job he absolutely loved.

No wonder I am not sleeping.

I realized that with the resignation from his job comes a loss of medical insurance for him…………yet another high stressor for me (the queen of our household’s finances).

The “high” of knowing he is fine has now officially blown itself out and the drudgery of finding Peter (to steal money from him) and hoping Paul never appears has begun. Yea me.

I find myself tearing up at inopportune times now………..for no danged reason at all.  And it is really beginning to annoy the tar outta me.

I really and truly do NOT need to cry when opening junk mail…nor do I need to cry while looking in the refrigerator for sandwich meats.

As all things though, this too shall pass.

I just wish there was an enema or other exudation that would free me of this damned enervation……….

okaay, I just amused myself with my own profundity……..off to bed. to sleep…perchance to dream

(yea I know..I went from whinging on and on to Shakespeare………Yes, I am that good)

7 thoughts on “whinging onwards to Shakespeare

  1. Sleep well. Things always look better in the morning.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I find the legs do less twitching and dancing with compression socks/stockings – yes, I know, hard to get on, get uncomfortable at oh-dark-sparrow-fart, but despite all that a few hours of decent sleep has value.
    And a pillow under the knees (the japanese neck rolls seem to be the best) seem to ease some of the pain (if you can tolerate the pillow, that is).
    Sleep well, dream unwisely.

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    1. thanks for the suggestions. I will try them

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I wish I had wise words for you, but I don’t. I can only relate to what you are going through. You and I, Suze, are built of the kind of stuff that gets us through the tough times. Don’t panic. You haven’t lost the gumption that pulled you through addiction and homelessness. That resolve may seem far away now, but you still have it. Love ya.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I turned 70 yesterday. Damn. I’m right now, rubbing my lower legs. They always hurt. So, I can relate somewhat. I hate your having to go through all this, Suze.

    This getting old business is a pain, sure enough. I drive a bus, once a week, hauling kids from school to a Boys and Girls club sponsored by the Lutheran Church. I drove yesterday, and I took a wrong turn, screwed up, damn near got completely lost. Kids got quiet. I finally turned around in a driveway and managed to get back on track. I know the route backwards and forwards…how did I make a wrong turn? No idea. I just did it. Old fart. But still at least I got back on track.

    That’s what we have to keep on doing–getting back on track–somehow. I hope things improve for you. I truly do. Hey, anybody who can quote Shakespeare in the middle of the night, deserves a break! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Paul. None of this is easy..but then, none of my entire LIFE has been easy so it should be just another thing to get through. This too shall pass…unfortunately it seems to want to pass much like a kidney stone. ah well.

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