So, Rory has this wierd “pimp Imp” challenge thing going……..yea, I don’t have a clue what a “Pimp Imp” is either …I have this vision of a gnome in a long , tan raincoat, fedora and a cigarette hanging from his mouth (ala Dick Tracy) with a haram of little women all wearing trashy dresses and spiked heels hanging out on a corner, while the Imp hisses “hey Youse..wanna a fun time” at passerbys………
anyway, it turns out he is just asking questions in a strangely wonderful accent…..
Here’s my response………
You SAY, you’re Norty, BUT Are You? Really?
Your neighbour next door is creating a helluvva a din!! It’s a Sunday, not even 7am, so nothing decent about it, just bang, bang, bang, whaddya do about it?
Be polite, ignore it or stomp ova there and give ’em a piece of your mind, or maybe, something even nortyier?
First of all, my neighbors are all extremely quiet..so if there were noises coming from their home I could actually HEAR, I’d grab a broom (I sold the guns) or a rake and go charging over to beat the invaders into submission.
Me and the boys we like to prank a bit, now l know l askt you this before loike, but what about joking, which we fink is different to pranking? Are you up for a bit of a laugh all the time, you know a bit of a sneaksy giggle on the side? Do what? Are you asking if I have a sense of humor? yes I do….I tend to laugh a LOT. I don’t pull pranks or make fun of people…EVER.
‘ave you ever prank called someone and pretended to be someone you aint for a giggle? yes, at about age nine or ten, my friends and I would make telephone calls and ask “Is your refrigerator running?” Then once we received a response of “yes” we’d shout “then go catch it”. Stupid, huh?
Even we Imps know about the Internet and the ‘trolling’ that goes on, they can be right fugly swines dem trolls, ‘ave you eva trolled anyone not nasty loike, but for fun? No. I hate trolls. I’d report others doing the trolling though.
Right your in you metal box with wheels and you are late for something that you ‘ave to be at like NOW, do you speed to get there? Nope. my life and property are both far more important than any appointment. Besides, a ‘speeder” generally gains only ONE minute on someone doing the speed limit or less. What’s the point?
Do you have to watch what you eat at Christmas or is it well you know, live for now type of fing? I always watch what I eat………
Have you ever, deliberately … mm, perhaps, maybe, taken someone’s decorations down outside their ‘ouse? you know loike for a laugh? Nope
Right, what’s your most annoying habit, but you pretend loike that its not, but you know it drives uvva people nuts, and you get a giggle out of their frustration? well, there’s no right way to answer this one. I don’t get a giggle or laugh from messing with people. Rory, I’m pretty sure your Imp is an annoying fellow.
Here’s one that’s always a good indicator for me … right in your own words when l say the word Norty, how does that cum across to you? How do you see Norty as meaning? you are saying “naughty”..BUT, the “nauty-ness you tend to ask about seems rather mean spirited.
If you ‘ad to describe yourself as one of the following what would you pik and why?
Sumthing else that we aint ‘eard of … well actually………….none of them.
Have you ever played that card game er, what’s it called, ‘ang on “Fugly wots that game called we wos playing last night with the Tooth fairy and the Bunny?That’s it, right, have youe ever played Cards Against Humanity and if so, did you win or lose? I have no bloody idea what you are talking about. IS there a game such as you describe? if so, they should be ashamed of themselves for inventing it..
Wot is the word that rhymes with Orange? [Easty Bunny wonts to know loike!] there is no word that rhymes with Orange. sorry
Does you show your appreciation for good food and drink in the time given tradtion of burpin’, belchin’ an’ fartin’ out loud loike, or are you one of these timid sorts? NO.
‘ave you ever gone into a public place and played a prank on the general public at large? One of my favourites is to pretend that l see the silly reindeer in the sky on the Eve and point and shout “Oh ma Gord LOOK reindeer flying high!” [When l have people looking l run orf!]
If you’ave done something loike that, wot wos it? the closest I have ever come to playing a public prank was to be a part of a Flash Mob at the Airport.